Deep and silent people do not like to place themselves in life's front row. They do not talk much, they think deeply, and the contribution of deep thinkers is significant in a world that is getting faster and faster, louder and louder.
I am sitting at my favorite cafe, the Tribeca in Paderborn (Germany) @tribecacoffeepaderborn, in front of my very tasty Caramell Macchiato. It's Monday, and the cafe is quite busy.
Two young men next to my table are chatting intensively. I intend to work on my blog, so I try not to listen to their conversation.
It becomes louder and even more intense. This would usually annoy me but now it just kicks me from my chair:
The conversation is about empathy, compassion, destiny, power of positive thinking, depth, and about how personal impression works. Each sentence is well-founded and substantiated. I am more than surprised.
Initially, I started my blog like this:
"2020, and we still think in old standards. We partly inherited them from our parents, partially adopted the standards from society—a lot of new rules are spread via multimedia and they are powerful.
Images of how you should look or how you should live to receive appreciation, become a high priority. If you do not match these schemes, you get at least evaluated. At worst, you get contemned, hate-commented, or marginalized.
Inspired by the conversation of the two young men, I feel relaxed. They just started talking about intuition and inner strength. With a smile on my face, I enjoy my Macchiato and still believe there is hope.
Forty-five years of my life, I lived influenced by "You are not a normal person"; "Give up, you are not able to do this"; "Stop reading, go out, meet people!" and so on.
The most exciting thing about this is that I always felt like I was perfectly fine, and I decided to leave those thoughts exactly there, where they belonged: at the person who gave them expression.
But if I am honest with myself, I must admit, that some of the poisoned meanings sneaked into my life-backpack. I carried this ballast for too long and it hindered me many times to take chances and live my very own life.
Becoming a Personal Image Coach, I realized how I lived and how much I needed to clear out my rucksack and take care of my future thoughts and believes. All of a sudden, I could see the treasures hidden behind the ballast: my potential, my creativity, my depth, and my strength.
All of a sudden, I understood what my otherness consisted of: sixty-nine percent introverted and highly sensitive. One of many, to have very special antennas, loading their batteries in silence and retraction and not emphasizing their person.
I very much know how self-esteem-confusion of silent people feels. I have experienced the nebula in self-confidence. We are many!
This is, what I'd like to share with you:
Responsibility is freedom!
Leave the state of a "victim of circumstances" to feel the unleashed energy and power and to invest this energy in your growth as a person.
I feel like this is the greatest gift I could possibly ever make myself.
Taking this path, I needed to break with standard images and their negative energy. I broke with the system of "hiding" and "covering" so-named "problem zones." I do not believe in perfectionism.
Further, I question traditions, given social lines, and modeled values.
What is most essential for me? Which values mirror my life approach? How do I intend to express my personality meaningfully?
The magic of nonverbal communication
The moment we leave our homes before we even said a word, we reveal the outside world a lot about ourselves. It's the language of our bodies, our expression, our gesticulation, our styling, and the entire condition of our appearance, that speak a very noticeable language.
That means that if you knew the secrets of nonverbal communication (body language, attitude, colors, shapes, proportions, accessories, individual behavior) and knew how to apply them, you could easily create your authentic image without a single word.
Silence is power
Faster, higher, further? Overrunning yourself and permanently optimizing? Always willing to appeal and to be present, fearing to miss something? Well, if you like to live your life this way, then feel free to do so.
I call this: "how to miss your own life."
Swooshing through your existence, permanently being somewhere else then in the actual moment, spreading in all directions, would distract you from all the essential things. Who am I and how do I want to contribute? What is my legacy?
I believe in the focused, balancing and positive energy stored in the well-considered and calm nature of introverts. We should invest this energy wisely now. Because we have a responsibility, the world needs us!
Can I rely on you?
Stay true to yourself!